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| I'm sure I'll figure out many more ways that Duke has changed me over the past three years as I enter ministry and start digesting the past three years (which may take a whole lifetime of ministry). But I thought I'd start what may become a series of short posts with what I realized tonight. I was looking through photos from Europe. The first several I looked at were from Athens. The next set was from Corinth, and as I was trying to figure out what country Corinth was in, my thought process went something like this: Corinth, Paul went there on his Achaian mission, so Corinth is in Achaia, which is Greece. Now I'm determining European locations based on Pauline chronology?
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| I have a male friend who just started dating a new girl. In our conversation today, I got grilled about whether I am dating anyone, and when I tried to explain that dating another div student is complicated, I got told that I need to lower my expectations. I shouldn't date someone thinking about marriage (although I've yet to figure out why I should start dating someone I know I could never marry), but I should just try to get to know people. Fine and good, except I can start to get to know people before I start dating them. What really got to me though, was his assertion that I needed to date because I needed to be well-rounded.
Aside from the question of whether he meant that I'm not well-rounded because I'm a single girl, it really gets to me that I can't be a full and complete person on my own. I try really hard not to make comments about someone's "other half" because I know that each person is a whole person on their own. Now of course, we are who were are and fully human only in those relationships with other people, and when we lose them, we really do lose a part of ourselves. But that is true of friends just as significant others. And it doesn't mean that I need a man in my life. I've never ever ceased to live a full life because I am single. I've been single most of my life. Even when I was dating, I refuse to not follow God's call to new places or tasks because of a man or lack thereof. And following that call is the fullest life that I can imagine.
I'm also bothered by his statement that I should lower my expectations. Lower them to what? I'm called of God to shepherd his people. I am well aware that it is a difficult and awe-some responsibility. If God is going to provide a person to minister with me, then that person had better be completely dedicated to Christ and fully willing to enter into that life of ministry. Those are high expectations. But I refuse to lower them. I can start to learn that about a person before we are dating, and I don't need to date someone on the off chance that they might be willing to take those kinds of risks. I've moved away from my family and friends and church networks twice now to follow God's call on my life. I'm moving to Southern California (God willing) to serve a church. I am well aware that God could call me to move out of the country, or to a new location. I have no idea what he's got up his sleeves, but it will surely be exciting to see the way this path turns. High expectations...you bet. And following God's call on my life demands no less.
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You asked me what is the good
of reading the Gospels in Greek. I answer that it is proper that
we move our finger Along letters more enduring
than those carved in stone, And that, slowly pronouncing
each syllable, We discover the true dignity of
speech. Compelled to be attentive we
shall think of that epoch No more distant than yesterday,
though the heads of caesars On coins are different
today. Yet still it is the same eon. Fear and desire are the same,
oil and wine And bread mean the same. So does the fickleness of the throng Avid for miracles as in the
past. Even mores, Wedding festivities, drugs,
laments for the dead Only seem to differ. . . . And thus on every page a
persistent reader Sees twenty centuries as twenty
days In a world which one day will
come to its end. --Czeslaw Milosz
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| Back in Durham...100 degree heat, 79% humidity, classes that only care
about blacks and whites (no one who doesn't fit in those boxes),
restaurants that still won't serve blacks decades after Brown v.
Board.
There are good things too. Professors with experience in the
parish, Sunday School classes from Duke profs, Dean Samuel Wells in
Duke Chapel, liturgical worship services, Eucharist every week, Durham
Bulls baseball games with friends, walking buddies, support for my
parish ministry.
An update is long overdue. I'll try to get around to it soon.
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| The last time I checked in, I wrote about my desire to pick up books other than theology books. This last weekend I took advantage of my flights across the country to engage in some escape literature. I finished About A Boy by Nick Hornby on the flight to Philadelphia.
The main character, Will, is concerned with nothing more than maintaining his carefree, responsibility-free lifestyle, and marriage and children are nowhere on the radar. He ends up going on a date with a single mother and thinks he has found the perfect solution: single women who are beautiful but not ready to commit to marriage. While attending a group for single parents, Will finds more than he bargained for: the ability to be compassionate, women who don't fit his own perceptions, and women and children who push him towards maturity and an adult life. Will ends up meeting Marcus, an amusing and struggling 12-year-old, and his mother who push Will out of his "freedom" and into responsibility until he is finally able to trust and invest in other people.
I was intrigued at first because the title was not reflective of the person who had given me the book. I was assured that it was a good book, and I agree. I do wish that there had been less crude language in the book, but I thoroughly enjoyed it. I had chance to spend 6 hours thinking of life, love, and children, and I was entertained. I was given the gift of one man's perception of male fear of commitment, and it was a humorous account.
I recommend About A Boy to anyone who wants to escape into the world of books for a few hours, and this evening, I'll do the same with the next book on my list, The Promise by Chaim Potok. So far, I'm enjoying it.
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